Category Archives: Moving

I'm digging September in NC

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We’ve had the most gorgeous weather here for the past few days – it’s been mild and in the mid-70’s, just about perfect. I really hope this is how summer is going to end, because last weekend it was in the 90’s and absolutely brutal. But this? This, I can totally handle.

On Friday, Cate and I met up with Cat and hit up a big consignment sale at one of the local outlet malls. Because did you hear? They’re having a boy! So Cat needed to stock up on onesies with puppy dogs and fire engines on them, and well, Cate and I just needed to get out of the house.

Which reminds me: the car situation. The movers finally sent me a check for $2400, based on the car’s weight. (Apparently our moving insurance was only 60 cents per pound, which makes no sense at all, since you can have a heavy thing that’s worth nothing or a lightweight thing that’s very expensive, but whatever.) I had AAA tow it to a local repair shop – one that was recommended by my insurance company – and they said that the repairs are going to cost over $4,000. My insurance company told me to send back the movers’ check with a “thanks, but this isn’t sufficient” letter, which I did. So, my car will get fixed, I’ll pay my $500 deductible, and that’ll be the last of it for me. Meanwhile, Progressive is going to unleash their Mighty Lawyer Hellhounds on the moving company to try to get the full amount out of them. But either way, I have nothing to do with it from that point onward. So hooray! My car is getting fixed! And it should be ready this Wednesday, which is great. I mean, boo on paying $500, but at least they promised that this won’t make our insurance premiums go up since this whole thing was in no way my fault. I wasn’t even there when it happened.

The point is, after 6 weeks of being a single-car family, we’re kind of going insane. There have been a lot of days that Dave has to go into the office, which means he takes the car and Cate and I are stuck at home with no transportation. So, since he was able to work from home on Friday and we had the opportunity to meet up with Cat and go shopping? Even though I was just tagging along and didn’t need to buy anything? HECK YEAH! Anything to rid myself of this cabin fever.

(Oh, and for the people who suggest that I drop Dave off at the office so I could have the car all day: yes, I suppose we could do that. But it’s 12 miles from our house to his office. That’s 24 miles round-trip, and if I’m dropping him off & picking him up, that’s 48 miles in one day. Gas is expensive, and Cate tends to throw up if she’s in the car for more than 15 minutes. So really? Kind of not worth it.)

Ok, apologies for the random aside. Back to the weekend recap. Yesterday, we hit Target in the morning and got some items crossed off our shopping list. In the afternoon, since the weather was so nice, we headed over to our town’s community park. It was our first time there, and it was really nice. There’s a big lake, with ducks and geese in it. I had brought some bread to feed them, so they swarmed all around us, which was pretty exciting, since Cate had never been that close to a duck or a goose before.

But, some of the ducks were either shy or not hungry, and they didn’t come onto the shore. Cate decided that was no good, so she’d just go hop in the lake and try to grab them herself. When her plan to go splash in the filthy lake with the big “NO WADING OR SWIMMING AT ANY TIME” sign was thwarted… oh, she was angry. She threw quite an epic tantrum, to the point that we had to move far away from the lake and the assorted water fowl, just to get her to chill out. She eventually did, and we had fun people-watching. Especially the people who brought their dogs to the park. (Oh, how my girl loves doggies. She freaks out every time one is within view.)

Today is another gorgeous day, although Dave and I spent most of the morning cleaning. Bummer, but the house is looking (and smelling) really nice. Cate is napping right now, but when she wakes up, we’re going to head over to our neighborhood playground. It’s pretty dinky, but she likes it, and it’s a nice 15-minute walk to get there, so mama will get some exercise too. Should be fun.

a different kind of automobile-related rage

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So… my car. My caaarrrr. I wrote about this before, but the movers? They are PISSING. ME. OFF.

After FIVE WEEKS of having no driveable car, I have made absolutely zero progress with these people. After harassing them mercilessly, they said that they mailed us a check for some completely bizarre amount: $2,424, because we were insured for 60 cents a pound. Apparently it’s based on my car’s weight. So, if it had been totalled, I would’ve only gotten 2 grand? WTF?

Anyway, they said they mailed the check on August 21st, and we never got it. I called them back and asked the address that it went to, and they said the wrong zip code. We asked them to send a new check, but then they backtracked and said that no no no, actually, it DID go to the correct zip. What? Freaking liars.

Oh, and my Progressive claims guy? Kinda useless. He called them a few times, called me back and said he could understand why I was frustrated because he couldn’t get anywhere with them either. Um…? Yeah, great, thanks for your help, dude!

I finally went back to the franchise moving company – the people that we actually hired in the first place, which is a small company based in Seattle. They were mortified, and called the headquarters to tell them to send us a new check. They said they sent it last Tuesday. So it’s been a week, and we still don’t have it. They’re based in Chicago, it really should only take maybe 2-3 days for something to get to us through the regular mail.

Want to know how angry I am? These are the movers we used: National Van Lines. I was trying not to say their name because I don’t want to badmouth specific companies on my blog, but seriously. Enough is enough. Avoid these people at all costs.

I’ve just filed complaints with both the Better Business Bureau and the Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration. We’ll see if THAT helps me make some progress with these jackasses.

seeking employment

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I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this or not, but my job back in Seattle technically moved out here with me. As in, they still consider me one of their freelance employees. But because my projects were all tech writing assignments for Microsoft, I don’t qualify for the projects where I might be required to go on-site. Which sadly, is… well, most assignments. It’s not like I can just hop in my car and be there in 15 minutes, right? So I haven’t had any work from them since sometime around June.

The move hit us pretty hard financially, so I’m now looking for another job to help us make up the difference. I know I don’t have to, we’d be ok in a few months either way, but I really miss using my brain every day. I’m overdosing on Noggin here. (I think when you form an opinion about whether you prefer Joe or Steve on “Blue’s Clues,” you’ve probably been watching it too much.) (And for what it’s worth, I like Joe, but Dave prefers the episodes with Steve.) So now I’m spending a whole lot of time browsing job sites. Which is a bit of a time-sucker.

And I feel guilty saying this, but I’m actually looking forward to Cate going to daycare again. She’s much happier when she gets to run around and play with other kids (and the energy she burns at daycare really seems to help with her sleeping, because she conks out), and I’m much more patient when I get a break from her, even if it’s just for a couple of hours.

Of course, everything you see on the news about the economy is not so great, so it’s entirely possible that my job hunting will prove useless and won’t turn up anything. And really, we’ll be ok if I don’t get a job. I’m just kind of hoping that I do.

no yoga for mama

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Apparently Cate’s love of the YMCA drop-in daycare was a one-time occurrence. Today I tried to go to a morning yoga class. Operative word there is tried. I got through the first twenty minutes of the class before one of the daycare ladies came to get me because Cate wouldn’t stop screaming.

My theory is that the first time we went to the daycare, there were only a couple of other kids there, and today the room was packed full of toddlers, which was probably overwhelming for her. Also, the last time it was both Dave and me dropping her off, which may have diffused some of her tension about freaking anytime mommy is out of her line of sight. But really, who knows?

The ladies in charge of the daycare were super-nice, and encouraged me to just hang out with her in the room (I had time, obviously, since my class had been cut short) so Cate could play and kind of get used to the other kids. And they encouraged me to keep trying, because they said that a lot of times it takes a while for kids to adapt to the new environment. After about 5 or 10 minutes of me being there with her, she was fine, running around and having fun.

There’s an aerobic dance class tomorrow (cardio-funk, holla!), and I’m thinking about getting there a half hour or so early so I can just hang out with her in the room until it’s time for my class. We’ll see how it goes.

poor widdle car

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Rather than writing another whiny post about our lack of sleep and how miserable we are because of it, I have something completely different to whine about today.

This is what the movers did to my car.

my poor car

(Buries face in hands and sobs)

The story that the movers told us is that they were driving the car up the ramp onto the truck, and apparently the ramp wasn’t hooked up correctly, because it collapsed when the car was halfway up. So, the front end of my car + the back end of the moving truck x high velocity = smoosh.

Now, this really shouldn’t be a big deal, right? The moving company is clearly liable, and they’re insured, so they’ll pay for the repairs, yes? Cue the corporate foot-dragging!

First, the truck driver told Dave that it was just “cosmetic damage,” but when I tried to start the car, it sounded really scary, so I turned it off and I refused to drive it. I called the claims department at the moving company and told them that they were going to have to pay to have it towed. They said no, but they’d send out an adjustor to decide for them whether or not the car is driveable. The adjustor was here for about 5 minutes – he looked at the car and said, “well, I wouldn’t drive it, so I certainly wouldn’t expect you to do so.” Fine. He also said that since the repairs would probably take a while, the movers should pay for me to have a rental car in the meantime. Which is a good point, because with Dave going into the office every day, and me with no driveable car, Cate and I have been going stir-crazy with no means of transportation during the day. I don’t think it bothers her as much as me, but I’ve been feeling more than a little trapped. So thank you, Mr. Adjustor Man.

I called the claims people for the next several days, while they continued to say that they hadn’t gotten the adjustor’s report yet. (He told me he’d have it to them within 24 hours.) Yesterday, the claims lady acted all happy and said, “well, I don’t want to make any promises, but I think you’re going to see something this week.” Um, sorry, I’m going to see… something? What does that even mean? She said that they were going to send me a check for the cost of the repairs. Wait a second, we haven’t even gotten the car to a shop to get an estimate, and they’re going to send me a check? How do they know how much the repairs are going to cost?

I mentioned to the claims lady that I need a rental car and that they should be the ones to pay for it, and she said, “well certainly, if you need a car, go ahead and rent a car, and when you fill out your claim form, we’ll consider reimbursing you for it.” You’ll consider reimbursing me? We can’t afford any extra expenses right now, so if the tab isn’t being picked up by the movers, we really can’t get a rental. The fact that I can’t get a straight answer out of these people has me at the end of my rope.

So I caved in and called Progressive, our car insurance people. I probably should’ve done it the first day, but I didn’t think we needed them since it was the moving company’s fault. At this point, I figure that if nothing else, they can talk to the movers’ insurance people and act as advocates on our behalf to figure out what the heck is going on. They were very nice and seem like they’re on our side, but seriously? I have no idea what our recourse is after this. I just want to cry when I see that picture of my car. Poor little Subaru.

worn. out.

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Ok for real, how long does it take a toddler to get on a normal sleep schedule after a huge event like moving to a new house? Because we are seriously about to lose our minds here.

Cate seems to think that midnight is her new bedtime. And she can’t fall asleep on her own at all, we have to cuddle with her until she’s sound asleep, then quietly transfer her to her crib. Same goes for naptime during the day. I’m so tired that I’m having trouble finishing a train of thought or even a full sentence.

I know I said that I was going to wait on letting her cry it out, but sometime after midnight the other night, I gave up. We had cuddled with her on the couch for over an hour, we had tried lying in bed with her in between us, and nothing was working. So I put her in her crib, turned on her Baby Mozart CD, and left the room. She was standing up in her crib wailing for me, and I walked out and closed the door. Way to feel heartless. Then I lay down next to Dave in our bed and cried. I felt completely helpless, and totally incompetent as a mother. She only cried for maybe 10 or 15 minutes before she fell asleep, but it was awful.

(For the record, I know I’m not incompetent. These are just the thoughts you have when you’re exhausted in the middle of the night.)

Last night ended up working out rather well. Cate had only taken a 20-minute nap yesterday (no fun for mama, I assure you), so she collapsed at the not-quite-but-almost-normal time of 9:45. And she didn’t make a peep until after 8:30 this morning. So that was lovely.

But this had better not mean that she’s weaning herself off of naps altogether. My mom says that my brother and I both stopped napping when we were about 18 months old. (We were sleeping 12 hours a night, so we were getting enough sleep, but we were done with naps totally.) And right now, naptime is the only time of day that I get any productive work done around the house, so I’m not ready to give it up just yet.

Speaking of which, I have seriously got to get back to work. My current job has sort of dried up lately, they haven’t had a new project for me since June, and I am not cut out to be a full-time stay-at-home mom. Also, judging by the way Cate explodes with utter glee anytime the neighbor kids are outside, I think she misses being able to play with other kids on a regular basis too. So I’m going to be looking for some more part-time work-from-home tech writing gigs. I think it’ll be good for everyone.

the adjustment phase (so far)

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I’ve been meaning to write a post about how Cate is adapting to the new house, but the thing is… I don’t really know. It’s hard to tell with 18 month-olds. I can tell you that her sleep patterns are seriously messed up right now, and I think that has a lot to do with most of the tantrums we’ve been getting lately. Generally she’s been pretty happy, but her meltdowns have been much bigger than they were, say, a month ago. I’m not sure if that’s her age (starting the terrible two’s early), if it’s the lack of sleep, or if it’s the move. Probably all three. But when she’s happy, it’s great.

sweet girl

And then last night she stayed up until almost midnight, which was pretty horrendous. She still can’t seem to go down in her crib on her own, but I think that’s fine for right now. I’m not going to push the crying-it-out issue for at least a couple of weeks.

I have made one pretty huge gaffe, though. We’ve been careful to avoid talking about Patsy or the other kids at daycare unless she says their names, because I think there’s no need to bring it up and upset her. We did the same thing when we were staying with my folks in Mississippi – no one was allowed to say the word “Daddy” because it inevitably led to tears.

(Btw, I took a bunch of pictures of the kids at daycare before we left, and I finally got around to copying them off my camera today. You can go see them in this set, if you’re interested.)

Patsy and Catie

(Another btw: before we moved, I gave Patsy and her daughter the URL for this site, so if you’re reading this, hi!)

So last night, I was getting Cate out of the bathtub and drying her off, and she started saying “doggy” over and over. She does this sometimes, talks about an animal that’s nowhere in sight, and usually I just roll with it. “Oh really, a doggy? Does the doggy say, ‘woof woof’? What color is the doggy?” etc.

And this is where I goofed up: I said, “Is the doggy’s name Shiloh?” Shiloh is one of Patsy’s dogs, and Cate loooved him. She called him Shi-boh. I should’ve known better than to say his name, I don’t know what I was thinking. Poor Cate’s eyes went huge and she stared at me for a few seconds, like she was trying to place exactly what Shiloh meant, then she remembered, and she frantically started signing and saying “shoes! shoes!” over and over. Like we were going to go get in the car and drive over to Patsy’s house to see Shiloh. So I said, “No, sweetheart, no shoes. It’s time to put on our PJ’s and get ready to go night-night.” And oh, the tears. There were many, many tears.

I think the moral of that story is that I’m an idiot who unnecessarily traumatized my child. The end.

Overall, though, things have been really good so far. We really like North Carolina, Dave likes his office, and the weather has been mercifully mild for the past couple of days, so we’ve been putting Cate in the stroller and going for little family walks in the evening. (Lovely except for the damn mosquitoes.) This is a really beautiful neighborhood and the people are unbelievably friendly. I’ve already met four other moms, and countless kids. Two boys came over yesterday to show us where a mama turtle buried her eggs in our front yard. So at least I’ll know what they’re doing when random kids show up to investigate a mound of dirt near our driveway.

Oh, and living in the suburbs where there are like 5 different grocery stores plus a Wal-Mart, a Target, and several restaurants (both fast food and sit-down) within a couple of miles of me? And having city water and sewer? And cable instead of satellite? LOVE. IT.

Sorry there haven’t been any pictures of the new house yet. It’s kind of embarassing to take pictures of the place when it’s covered in boxes. So for now, you’ll have to settle for pictures of our cute, tiny backyard.

running with her ball across the yard

We could mow that sucker in like 15 minutes. It’s awesome.