mental photograph

Yesterday over on Shannon’s blog, I mentioned something in the comments about how I think my blog at this point is mostly a way to chronicle all of the little moments in Catie’s life that I worry I’d otherwise forget. Yesterday was one of those days that I want to make sure I remember.

It started off rough, Catie was in a bad mood during our playdate with the neighbor across the street. Then I realized we were almost out of milk, so I had to go to the store (she drinks a cup of milk before AND after her nap). She cried when I suggested going to the grocery store, so I told her that we’d go to Target (it’s a Super Target, has a grocery store included), and if she was really good, I’d buy her a toy. And you know? It worked. She was an angel through the whole store. No whining, no crying, no “cawwy you!” (she hasn’t figured subject versus object, so she still says “carry you” instead of “carry me”). She walked right next to the cart (no running off), and when she got tired, she asked to ride in it. After I got my necessary groceries, we headed over to the toy section, as I promised. She picked out a mommy and baby giraffe from the realistic-looking animal figures, and I said ok. The deal had been for one toy, but the baby couldn’t leave the store without her mommy, so… ok, I caved. The two animals together were less than $8, so fine. No big deal.

We came home, had lunch, and she went down for a nap. We lay in her big-girl bed together while I read her a few books, and when we were done, she said, “Mommy, snuggle,” and she hugged my head against her chest until she fell asleep. (It took a few tries to extricate myself without waking her up.)

When she got up from her nap, I noticed that the sky outside had suddenly gotten very dark. Friday is trash day, so I suggested that we go get the trash cans inside before it started to rain. I brought the cans in, and we sat in the driveway looking up at the gray sky and talking about the wind for a few minutes. Finally, it started to rain, so we went in.

Then we sat in the doorway, with the front door wide open, and watched the rain pour down. It was one of those really intense summer thunderstorms that I missed so much when I lived in Seattle, and I love to watch them. I didn’t worry about raindrops hitting the hardwood floors, or bugs getting in, or the fact that the door was open while the air-conditioner was running. We just sat there in the doorway, just the two of us, and watched the rain. Every time it thundered, Catie told me that it was a big panda up in the sky saying “BOOM!!” (I’m not sure where she got the thunder = panda thing, I think she misunderstood Dave the first time he said “thunder.” She heard it as “panda,” and we’ve been unable to correct her since then. So in case you didn’t know, thunder is caused by a giant panda up in the clouds. True story. Ask any meteorologist, I’m sure they’ll back up that theory. Or they might look at you like you’re crazy and back slowly away from you. Coin toss, really.)

After it stopped raining, we went outside to jump in puddles and throw leaves around.

looking for that giant panda up in the clouds that made all the thunder

I love how the humidity makes her hair curl

Later that night, when Dave lay in bed with her to help her fall asleep, and she was still holding onto the mommy and baby giraffes, Dave asked her what the giraffe says. (He meant it as a trick question, as I’m pretty sure giraffes don’t say much of anything.) Without missing a beat, Catie responded: “Hi, tree.” Well, yes, I suppose that is what the giraffe would say, if he talked.

It was a very good day. And I want to remember all of this. I want to remember how funny and smart she is (and how she can crack up both Dave and me with a single phrase), how she gave me two big kisses smack on the mouth in the middle of Target for buying her those giraffes, how much I love to snuggle with her as she falls asleep, how her hair feels when she’s sitting in my lap, leaning against me watching thunderstorms. I hope that yesterday is one of those days that I can still remember when I’m old and gray. And maybe by blogging about it, and the fact that I’ll have a written record of it, it will be.

a hacky photo entry that requires no real forethought or editing

Catie & I doing downward-facing dog
A little toddler yoga. (Catie’s request, it’s her new favorite thing.)

Catie
At the top of the stairs.

Catie playing with "Britty's Bear"
Playing with “Britty’s bear.”

Catie loves her PB&J sandwiches
It’s peanut-butter-jelly time!

playing dress-up in Mommy's new shirt
Want a sneak preview of one of the shirts I bought for BlogHer? Here you go. Catie thought it’d be fun to play dress-up in it.

I love the contrasting hair colors
Contrasting hair colors.

Catie says "CHEESE!!"
Catie says, “CHEESE!!!”

More about the weekend later; I gotta get to work.

blogging as a means to not think about lasers in my freakin' eyeballs (which, FAIL)

My eye surgery is this afternoon. It occurred to me while I was getting dressed this morning that it was probably not the best day to apply both eyeliner and (non-waterproof) mascara, but it was too late by the time I realized it. I guess I’ll just look like a raccoon later when my eyes water it off.

And I forgot to say it earlier, but thank you to all of you who left kind words when I freaked out about the surgery last week. But I need to clarify, the surgery I’m having is not lasik. I’m still going to need my glasses after this is over. Basically what they’re doing is using a laser to poke a few holes in my iris (shudder), which will ensure that the fluid in my eyes can circulate. (If the fluid can’t continuously circulate, the optic nerve will die, hence the blindness.) You can read all about it here if you like – I started to read it and freaked out and had to close the window. But I think it’s relatively accurate.

Btw, I have no idea if they’re planning to drug me for this procedure or not. I forgot to ask beforehand. So I’m bringing my Klonopin with me, and if they don’t offer me any drugs, I’ll just go ahead and knock myself out, thank you very much.

And I have to say, it’s been a lot of fun having Brittany here this week. She has a great camera (that I totally want to steal) and we got some fantastic pictures of Catie, which I’m going to try to upload soon. As an added bonus, my sister flew in for the weekend last night, so I’ll have both Tracy and Brittany here to take care of Catie while I’m out of commission (and Dave will be, presumably, taking care of his drugged-up wife). Catie is in Happy Toddler Overload, she doesn’t know what to do with all the attention. So no worries on that end.

Oh, one random note: yesterday Catie was in a bad mood and I asked her if she wanted to watch a movie. She walked over to the shelf where all of her DVDs are stored, and pulled out “E.T.” (which I bought before she was born, but the cellophane was still on it because I rarely feel the need to reduce myself to a sobbing mess). I wasn’t sure if it would be too scary for her, so I skipped the beginning and started it at the point where Elliott and E.T. meet for the first time. She loved it. She walked over to the TV to pat Elliott and reassure him that he shouldn’t be scared, because E.T. was his friend. I can’t really say how great it is to see your kids enjoying movies that you loved when you were little, but yeah, it was fantastic.

random Wednesday stuff

1. It looks like we’ll be staying pretty busy with company for a while. My brother spent Saturday night with us, and shortly after he left on Sunday afternoon, Brittany came to visit. (Which, if you read her blog, you probably know exactly why she came on Sunday instead of on Thursday, which had been her original plan.) On Sunday night, my sister called – she had travel plans for this weekend that fell through, and she was wondering if she could change her plane ticket and come to Raleigh instead. Sure, why not! So we’ll have a continuous stream of visitors for over a week, which is actually kind of cool. Especially since it distracts me from the fact that…

2. Our house closing date is going to get changed. The closing depends on us receiving some funds from the UK (we’re taking out a business loan against a couple of pieces of property that Dave and his mom and brother own together), and we just found out from my mother-in-law today that it’s going to take longer than we thought, due to the fact that we have to wait for lawyers and surveyors and all sorts of legal mumbo-jumbo to finish up. And you know, that’d be fine, if it wasn’t for the fact that we have to be out of this house on July 31st, and if we can’t close by then, we’ll have nowhere to live.

So, we’re asking the sellers if we can rent the new house for the month of August (along with a letter from the bank in the UK promising that the funds are, in fact, on their way… at some point). And I’m crossing my fingers and praying that they say ok and don’t decide to walk.

3. In other real estate news, for the past two days I’ve been trying to help Brittany find an apartment in the Raleigh area. It’s been fun – her arm is all banged up and she’s taking Vicodin for the pain, so she’s been very giggly and stoned through the whole process. I’ve been her designated driver, and I’ve been taking lots of pictures of all of the apartments because I wasn’t sure she would remember anything that we saw. But we’ve found a few apartments that she likes, now we just need to narrow it down and pick one.

4. Today’s date is 07-08-09. Funny.

Happy Fourth

We had a nice fourth of July here. It’s odd because it isn’t really a date that we typically celebrate that much in our house, since 1/3 of our household comes from the country that sort of made that whole Revolutionary War thing necessary. But Dave’s a good sport about American holidays, and he wasn’t even offended when the neighborhood association stuck an American flag in our yard next to our mailbox. (Why, I don’t know. But it was awfully tempting to buy a Union Jack flag to hang up, just to balance things out.)

Anyway, yesterday morning, Catie and I went to meet up with my cousin Cat and her family (plus a couple of friends) at the Eno River Festival in Durham. That was a lot of fun – we ate giant turkey legs, corn dogs and other festival foods, wandered around, heard these guys, who were un-freaking-believable, and let the girls play in the river. The river, btw, was a hilarious example of how different Catie and Elizabeth are. Elizabeth sees the river, and immediately strips off her dress so she can swim in the river in just her underpants. Meanwhile, it took me 20 minutes just to get Catie to take her shoes off and stick one toe in the water.

Catie in the Eno River

This was the deepest I could ever coerce her to go, and she whined and cried about it the whole time. I wish I had a picture of Elizabeth for contrast, because it was a great visual example of Daredevil Child versus Cautious Kid.

After the festival, we came home and got cleaned up just in time for my brother to arrive from Charlotte. He didn’t have anything to do for the holiday weekend and wanted to know if it was ok if he came to visit. I said of course, so he drove over & spent the night with us last night. As soon as he arrived, we headed over to Cat and Tony’s for dinner.

I must say, I love hanging out at Cat & Tony’s house. It’s always relaxed and fun and easy. Plus, you know, I get to smoosh on this little guy.

Austin loves his thumb
Mmm, thumbs, nom nom!

Cat’s parents (my aunt & uncle) are in town, and a couple of their friends plus Tony’s sister Diana were also there, so it was a nice big group of us. We had grilled chicken, hot dogs, and I think I ate my weight in chips & hummus. Oh, and there were at least four desserts. Awesome.

As we were leaving to go see the fireworks (the viewpoint is about a half-mile or so from Cat & Tony’s house), Cat told Elizabeth to go get her shoes. Her shoes were upstairs, so she said, “Come with me, Catie.” Catie said ok and followed her. And they held hands as they walked up the stairs together. My heart almost exploded from the cuteness.

Catie & Elizabeth

I cannot tell you how much I love watching our two girls grow up together. Even when they fight (and there are occasional disagreements about whose turn it is to use a certain toy), it’s still great to see them interact.

Then of course, there were the fireworks, but I need a new camera, so most of my pictures were crap. This was the first fireworks experience for both Catie & Elizabeth, and they absolutely loved it. Our viewpoint was from a field a couple of miles away from the action, so we could see all the explosions and colors without too much noise. It made the whole thing much less scary for the girls.

Chris & Catie at breakfast

This morning, we went out for breakfast, and drove my brother past our new house so he could see it. He left to go back to Charlotte soon afterward, and Catie went down for a nap.

This evening, we’re getting a visit from the lovely and delightful Brittany. She has a few days off work, so she’s going to come stay with us to look for a job and an apartment before she moves here next month. Yay! I can’t wait!

Edited to add: I just realized that I wrote a post with this exact title, five years ago today. That was the first fourth of July that Dave and I celebrated, watching the fireworks from the roof of my apartment in downtown Seattle. We’d only been dating for about six weeks at that point. Aw, nostalgia.

inappropriate to laugh

Generally between the two of us, Dave is the more relaxed parent and I’m more of the disciplinarian. I don’t know how it worked out that way, but he’s just less uptight about rules and boundaries than I am. And that’s fine, I guess. But it means that I’m in the position of being Mean Mommy far more often than I’d like.

This morning, Catie wanted to watch a DVD that we borrowed from our baby-sitter (this one, if you care). Which, fine, whatever. Since I am always in favor of the path of least resistance, I thought it might be easier to get her dressed in front of the TV than to try to coerce her upstairs with me. So I grabbed a clean diaper and her clothes for the day, and brought them downstairs. She let me take off her pajamas and change her diaper, but then she refused to put on her clothes. She thrashed and squirmed and made a huge stink about it. I told her that she could either get dressed or go to time-out. She continued to thrash around, so fine, time-out it is. And “the frog movie” (which is what she calls the LeapFrog DVD) was promptly turned off.

(For the record, time-out at our house is a spot on the dining room floor. There really isn’t anything in that room except some boxes, certainly nothing that could qualify as entertainment for her, so it usually works.)

I left her in her time-out spot and walked into the kitchen – part of the deal with time-out is that I ignore her for the two minutes that she’s in there. I heard her making some odd grunting noises like she was struggling with something. When the two minutes were up, I walked back into the dining room and saw that she had taken off her diaper and flung it across the room. So there she was, still sitting in her exact time-out spot, hands in her lap, head down and bottom lip stuck out… and stark naked except for her socks. I had to turn around and look away to try to regain my composure, because I seriously almost died laughing right there.

It took a minute, but I got my Mean Mommy face back on, and I went over to her and sternly put her diaper back on her, then escorted her back to the living room and got her dressed. And she was fine after that, she didn’t act up at all. I know it would’ve made the situation worse if I had laughed, but man alive, it took just about every ounce of energy I had to not crack up.

So what I’ve learned is that parenting a two year-old is both incredibly frustrating and completely hilarious. I sort of knew that already, I just didn’t expect it to be both at the same time.

the night visitor

For the past four nights in a row, Catie has woken up somewhere around 3 or 4 a.m., and climbed into bed with us. She isn’t asking for milk or a diaper change or anything, she just scurries her tiny self in between me and Dave and settles herself in. The other night she didn’t even announce that she had come into the room, I just felt her hand on my calf as she hoisted herself up onto the bed. Then she plopped her head on the pillow next to mine, wrapped her little arm around my neck, and said “Bwanket!” I pulled the covers up over her and she went straight to sleep.

Here’s the thing: I know it’s a bad idea to let your toddler sleep in bed with you. I know. If we give her an inch, she’ll take a mile; she’ll never sleep in her own bed for the rest of her life, blah blah blah… But you know, I’m finding it difficult to be a hard-liner on this issue. For one thing, she really isn’t disrupting my sleep that badly. Sure, it takes a few minutes for me to readjust myself around her and go back to sleep, but it isn’t like she’s keeping me awake for hours in the middle of the night.

The other thing is that I’m pretty sure I know the reason why this has suddenly become a trend. She’s not an oblivious little baby anymore, she’s noticing all the boxes around the house. And we’ve been talking to her about how we’re going to move to a new house. I keep telling her how someday soon, we’re going to move to a new house, but it’ll be fun because Mommy & Daddy will be there with her, and the kitty-cats will be there, and all of her toys and books will be there too. Way to make it sound easy and harmless, right?

Um, not so much, as it turns out. Last Thursday, I had to pick her up from daycare and then go to the new house to meet up with Dave and our realtor for the house inspection. When I picked her up, I told her we were going to our new house. We walked in, and she said, “My toys?” She searched the whole house, and when she saw that her toys weren’t there, she was more than a little distraught. Oops. Way to clarify things, Mom. I tried to explain that her toys were still at our old house because we haven’t moved yet, but I think I just confused her even more.

So my theory is that the sleep interruptions have a lot to do with the fact that she’s feeling a little insecure and stressed out. And yes, I suppose I could be harsher about it, and do the SuperNanny technique of returning her to her own bed, no matter how many times she tries to climb in bed with us. But I feel bad for her, so I’m taking the easy way out. I’m also pretty sure that this behavior will start up again after we move, so I don’t see the point in going all Sleep Nazi now, only to have to do it all over again in a month.

Besides, I can’t say that I hate waking up with this right next to me.

napping (with friends)

Sure, I miss having a pillow to myself, but eh, I think I can manage this for a little while.