I was in a little bit of a funk yesterday.
This is the first Valentine’s Day that I’ve been single since 2004. Eight years is a pretty long time.
Also, exactly one year ago (on Valentine’s Day eve) was when Dave first announced that he wanted to split up. I was pregnant with Lucy at the time. So I guess you could say that I now have sort of a sour taste in my mouth about Valentine’s Day. It was never a huge deal to me to begin with, really, but that’s a pretty bad association to have with this particular holiday.
I completely forgot about the Valentine’s Day party at daycare today, so I ended up filling out Catie’s Valentine’s Day cards for her at 10 p.m., after both girls were in bed. Those kids are getting the most slapdash, thrown-together Valentine’s Day treats ever. Seriously, I used Ziploc sandwich bags filled with candy and stickers with the kids’ names on them. I figured that when you’re 4 or 5 years old, you only really care about the candy, not the card, right?
Still, that seems like the lamest Valentine’s Day goodie bag ever. It felt like a huge “mom FAIL” moment, even though I know Catie doesn’t care.
So, yeah, I was bumming pretty hard yesterday.
Then I got some messages from Guy #3. I need to call him something else because the other two guys are really out of the picture now. Oh screw it, his name is Matt. I’m not posting his last name, and there are enough Matts and Matthews in the world that I doubt anyone searching for him is going to stumble upon this blog post by accident.
So, yeah, emails from Matt. He managed to steam up my inbox pretty well. (Note: that is not a euphemism. He’s still in another time zone.) My day was brightened up considerably, as pathetic as that may sound.
And then, this morning, Catie brought me a flower for Valentine’s Day. Sure, it was a fake flower that we already had in the house, but still. I thought that was really sweet.
So, you know, maybe it’s not so bad after all.
Still…
Sigh. Yeah. Sad but true.
Oh, yeah, my Valentine does too!
Love you to pieces. Hug yourself and the girls for me today!!
XOXO
Cindy, don’t feel like a mom fail!! kids over here don’t bother sending each other anything on valentines so just consider all Catie’s daycare friends spoilt rotten lol xxxx at least you made an effort and i bet they all loved it x happy you are having fun with your inbox!!! (arm that doesn’t sound good does it? he he)
Well, you’ve got nowhere to go but up as far as Valentine’s Day is concerned. I think a steamy inbox is an improvement over getting dumped, so there’s that!
And seriously, a mom-fail is sending in nothing when all of the other kids have something.
My wish for you is a spring fling. Somebody, buy a plane ticket!!!!
Wow…what an amazing story. I can’t believe, two beautiful children later, he would decide to “split up”, especially on Valentines Day. My thoughts about Valentines Day would be sour too if I experienced that. Thankfully,I have yet to go through a divorce or break-up with a boyfriend on that day. It’s amazing how men think that they caan just walk away from everything and not bother to look back. I’ve seen it happen in my own family. And, what is he doing in England? Just curious to know why he is so far away from his family. Was that the problem from the start…being so far away from each other? I guess, it is hard to keep a bond/loving relationship with someone being that far away from each other. It can definitely put strain on any relationship. I’ve always believed that true love exists and always will, but I do realize now that I never thought about growing up that sometimes, unfortunately, true love simply fades off into the distance to never return again for whatever reason. It’s just sad to hear or see of situations like yours where you both have two children who are involved. However, they are still young enough to adjust. Also, the infant won’t really need much adjustment because she won’t even know any different. It’s the older one you have to really be concerned about in the big scheme of things.
Well, it sounds to me like you are doing a wonderful job as a mother. Hey, no one is perfect…even mothers make mistakes sometimes. But, like Celeste said, a failing mother is one that gives her children nothing at all. At least, you were concerned about their feelings despite the fact that you have somewhat bad feelings, and rightfully so, about Valentines Day. Good luck with raising your kids as a single parent. Shame on him for leaving you with those gorgeous little girls. I don’t know how any father could look into their children’s eyes or even think about their children and still decide to split rather than at least try to work on the relationship before officially exiting…