The scene: grocery store, last night.
Checkout lady, who I’m guessing was about 50-ish: “So how far along are you?”
Me: “Three and a half months.”
Her: (tilts her head sideways, squints and looks suspicious) “You sure there’s only one in there?”
Me: (trying to laugh it off, but honestly feeling like I might cry) “Um, yeah. I’ve had an ultrasound, I’m definitely only carrying one.”
Saintly lady in line behind me: “Oh, don’t worry. You’re probably just having a boy.”
I was stunned because I thought that everyone in the polite universe knew to never ask a pregnant woman “are you sure you aren’t have twins/triplets/a litter?” I really didn’t know how to react.
Honestly, I’m sort of surprised when strangers start conversations with me about pregnancy at all, because I still feel like I’m in the in-between phase. You know, the “maybe she’s pregnant, or maybe she just has an unfortunate body shape, and it’s probably better to err on the safe side and not mention it” phase. Or at least, that’s what I would do if I encountered someone who looked like me. Who wants to go into that minefield and risk being incorrect?
But then, I guess the maternity tops do sort of give it away.
Which reminds me, I’ve been saying “three and a half months” for a while, but I don’t think it’s even accurate anymore. I’ll be 16 weeks pregnant as of Saturday. If you operate under the assumption that a month is 4 weeks and/or 28 days, doesn’t that make me four months pregnant?
And by that logic, if the average pregnancy is 40 weeks long, doesn’t that mean that it’s actually more like ten months rather than nine? How on earth do people calculate this stuff? It’s making my head spin. And the books are no help, because they all seem to have their own definitions.
In the meantime, though, I think I’m going to start lying about my due date. I’ll just tell strangers that I’m a month or so farther along than I am, and then they’ll think that I’m wonderfully svelte given my condition.
Either that, or I’m just going to lose my mind and punch the next person who implies that I’m having twins.